Celebrating personal discordia and spiritual anarchy.

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"Anarchy is not intended to be sustainable. It is not a system of government, a codified list of rules and beliefs, or a mind set geared toward cultural constructivism. It is a spark, a flash, a small flame that ignites a paradigm-obliterating explosion. It is destructive by nature. It lies dormant and, like diesel fuel, can only be ignited by tremendous pressure. It deconstructs. It strips flesh from bone and grinds bone to dust. It is doomed to consumption in the conflagration instigated by its own primal spark. It is a catalyst. It is tinder. It is powder and fuse."

Rich Oliver

Flow Going

What the hell are we doing here?

I think the answer, at least in my Cosmology, lies in the absolute random, dumb luck of existence and sentience. Each is a statistical miracle in and of itself, but especially the part that screams “I am” as it recognizes itself reflected in a shiny surface.

Maybe we think too much. Maybe we were better off when our processes were simpler and more limbic. Sentience is a curse, especially when coupled with the annoying physiological/neurological predispositions toward matrixing and Gestalt formation.

We look at things and try and sort them into piles that make sense. Then we sort the piles into more specific piles, then start sorting those piles ad infinum….makes us kinda look nuts if seen from a macro perspective, no? Are we squirrels? Are we ants? Are we some kind of crazy algae or fungus? Bacteria? Probably. But in a fractal universe, one person’s bacteria are another’s deities.

I don’t know why good people suffer and crack heads don’t sometimes. I don’t know why my friend and his wife, both social workers and both amazing, liberal, intelligent, kind people are having to deal with a possible molar pregnancy and consequent chemotherapy after years of being told they can’t conceive and a seventeen year old meth addict/prostitute is having her third child removed from her custody by DCFS….I don’t know why that is.

Maybe there is no “why”. Maybe there is only “is”. We’re all just blips, anomalies, transient spikes in the Universal Transmission. We are fragile. We are sensate experience incarnate, temporary, beautiful, fleeting pieces of the God Fractal moving from existence to existence along the infinite continuum. Wooo Woooo. Total crazy train right? Just because it’s crazy don’t make it less possible.

Maybe our job is to feel and experience. Just that. Nothing more. Feel, experience, make piles. Feel some more. Experience some more. Make smaller, more ordered piles. Then shut off and take our knowledge back to the Creator. Sounds kinda peaceful to me.

A Lakota Hyoka Chief once told me “Brother we are all going to flow down stream with the current. Can’t stop that from happening. You just have to decide if you are going to spend your time in the stream fighting and kicking to get back up stream, or if you are going to learn to float with the current, open your eyes and take in the sights along the way. Either way, you will arrive at exactly the same time and place”.