Celebrating personal discordia and spiritual anarchy.

Search This Blog

"Anarchy is not intended to be sustainable. It is not a system of government, a codified list of rules and beliefs, or a mind set geared toward cultural constructivism. It is a spark, a flash, a small flame that ignites a paradigm-obliterating explosion. It is destructive by nature. It lies dormant and, like diesel fuel, can only be ignited by tremendous pressure. It deconstructs. It strips flesh from bone and grinds bone to dust. It is doomed to consumption in the conflagration instigated by its own primal spark. It is a catalyst. It is tinder. It is powder and fuse."

Rich Oliver

Petition for deliverance

This run hasn't been easy. It hasn't been particularly enjoyable and it has left some very deep scars. 42 years, at least 30 of them have been absolutely rife with disappointment and various degrees of pain. What the fuck was I thinking when I signed that fucking contract? I'm wondering what would happen in the karma department if I decided to get off the ride now instead of waiting. I'm just sayin...even the good times seem to have hidden burs and splinters. I think I just reached the bottom of my barrel. The very bottom. I recognize it. Been here a couple of times before…it has an odd peace associated with it, the wind blows through here and the sadness is absolutely exquisite. I want this to be over, not just this episode or this event or even this decade. I want the whole mortal experience to be over already. I’m not enjoying it. Not at all. Too many mistakes, too much wasted time and opportunity…I just want to go home now.